bitchsLApped: Shilo Gets Schooled by LA Part 2 of 1000
- They do not call that shit HollyWEIRD for nothin’. Wow. That place puts new meaning to the word “freak,” as in “freak-that-should-be-hospitalized-and-restrained.”
- Always read the parking signs. ALWAYS. Then read them again. And maybe one more time for good measure.
- Lost ticket at the parking garage? A fat bud will go a long way in buttering up the parking attendant and getting you out of the mighty lost-ticket fee.
- Speaking of green, it is practically legal here. They sell it out of jars at clubs, I shit you not.
- You know you are getting acclimated to life in LA when you pull into a parking lot, see the price is $10, and think: “Not bad!”
- If you meet someone who claims to be a celebrity or in a famous band, don’t immediately assume they are fucking with you and call them out. It could be Pendulum.
- Santa Monica and Santa Monica Boulevard are two very different places. Clarify BEFORE you leave the house.
- Two words: ANIMAL STYLE. Oh sweet Jesus.
- “Security Dogs for Rent.” Are you SERIOUS LA? Really? Dogs for rent?
- Hearing: “Yeah you LOOK like you just came from Hollywood.” = not such a good thing, I’m pretty sure. Please refer to #1.